Another Relapse

I had to get my mum to call the therapist and tell her I couldn’t make the group today. I’m so angry at myself because today is the first one (it’s a 6 week thing) and not going to the first one means that if I decide to go to the others, I’m like the outsider. They’ve all met today and my stupid fucking chronic fatigue has stopped me. I should have known that being at work yesterday and doing this today would be too much but I wanted to believe that I was better, I wanted to believe that I was getting over it. I’m not.
You would think that after years of ‘getting better’ and relapsing I would be used to this but each time is just as upsetting. However sick you are and with whatever illness, I think you always cling to the hope that YOU will be the one to be cured. It doesn’t matter how many times I hear or am told that very few people fully recover from ME/CFS, I always hope that I will. Maybe that’s a good mindset or maybe it’s unhelpful, I really don’t know. All I know is, today isn’t a good day.

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2 thoughts on “Another Relapse

  1. Wishing you a better day. I hear you re the “getting better days”. I had to learn to simply enjoy the better days, pace myself and help myself toward tomorrow. Easier said than done!!

    • Learning to enjoy the better days is something I definitely need to learn to do, I’m glad you have. Lots of love and thanks for reading. Xx

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